Let me say in advance Barbie Film, I didn’t really see the movie and I don’t have any specific plans to do this.
That said, the film has certainly had a big impact, and in particular one scene is often mentioned as particularly powerful. In this scene, Gloria, depicted by the actress America Fererra, gives a passionate speech for Barbie about how it is ‘literally impossible to be a woman’. What makes it impossible, she explains, is that women are kept to a wide range of expectations that are incompatible, so whatever they do, it’s always wrong. In one article About how people responded to this speech, a viewer says that she loved it because it revealed: “What the expectations of the self -contradictory society of women are,” and this was a common reaction. But I want to suggest that something is misleading here.
A way to respond is now to say that men can also claim to feel bound by all kinds of impossible and conflicting expectations. And it is worth pointing out that the director of the Barbie Movie herself agrees – she is quoted in the aforementioned article that men say: “Do you know their own speech they can never feel, you know? And they have their double cord, which is also painful.” Meghan Daum rewritten the Barbie Speech to apply to men who make this point. In the film, Gloria says for example:
You should stay beautiful for men, but not so beautiful that you seduce them too much or that you threaten other women because you should be part of the sisterhood. But always stand out and always be grateful. But never forget that the system is rigged. So look for a way to acknowledge that, but always be grateful.
Daum writes this again as:
You would look good for women, but not so clever that you look uncomfortable or vain or as if you are overcompensing for something else. You have to distinguish yourself without looking like you are trying too hard. You have to announce your performance without creating or being desperate. You have to win in the game while you ensure that you know that you know that the system has been decorated to your advantage. You have to say this, even if it is no longer rigged, or at least not feels that way. Or maybe is Hung, which means that you don’t really deserve something that you have ever received. But you have it anyway. Or maybe you didn’t do that, but in both cases you have to be grateful.
But this is not the reaction I would have to the Barbie speech. For me, both speeches miss the goal because they make the same mistake. The mental fear that is expressed both Gloria And Daum’s rewriting comes from the fundamental error to think that the idea that “society is expected” is so-and like of you is even a coherent idea to start with.
“Society” has no expectations “society” is not a self-conscious entity. In a certain society there are many people, and those people have a wide range of preferences, desires and expectations. But these incompatible preferences for individuals do not change magical to ‘society’ in one way or another with multiple and contradictory ‘expectations’ of you specifically.
If you are the type of person who likes to chat with strangers about public transport, some people will find your chattiness annoying and impressive. On the other hand, if you keep silent in silence, some people will find you aloof and dour. If you get in one way or another in your head that this means that “society” is impossible from you to “require” society “requires you to be both speech and extravert, but at the same time leave people alone And nobody disturbing, you eventually bind to yourself mentally binding in knots about a concept – what ‘society’ ” – that does not even exist. A better and much psychologically healthy reaction is to easily acknowledge that there are many different people in a certain society with different preferences and expectations, and there is nothing you can do that everyone will please.
Gloria is wrong about what is impossible here. It is not that ‘society’ is impossible and contradictory ‘expectations’ that can never be fulfilled. The idea that ‘society’ ‘expectations’ is in any way relevant analogue to how people are expectations yourself The impossibility. The fictional Gloria, and the real people who think, can save themselves a lot of unnecessary emotional and psychological pain by recognizing this.