“May you have warmth in your igloo, oil in your lamp and peace in your heart!”
Inuit proverb
The holidays are just around the corner.
A time of necessary relaxation and more time with the people closest to us.
A time of stress and worry. A time of not all the joy you might have hoped for or that was promised by cheerful advertising and movies.
It can be a time of mixed feelings.
That’s why today I’d like to share 5 powerful and timeless tips that can help you make the holidays – and 2025 too – a more joyful and peaceful time.
1. Slow down.
“Try taking it slower for fast-acting relief.”
Lily Tomlin
Slow down first. Even though it may feel strange and you have to force it a bit. Slow down your body, move and walk slowly.
Breathe more slowly and deeply into your stomach (and focus on that for two minutes and see what happens).
Eat more slowly (not only will this help you relax, it will also help you avoid overeating during the holidays, as it takes about 20 minutes for your brain to register that you are full).
Slow it all down and pay attention to what you’re doing.
Now be here and focus on just one thing at a time.
By slowing down, by being here now, by not allowing your focus to be divided among many things, you – your body and your mind – begin to relax.
2. Appreciate the little things instead of focusing on perfection.
“Nobody can get discouraged with a balloon.”
Winnie the Pooh
Daily happiness is largely about appreciating the little things.
If you simply allow yourself to be happy when you achieve a big goal or when everything fits together perfectly, you are making life more difficult than it needs to be.
Instead, focus on appreciating things you may take for granted.
Take two minutes and look for things in your life that you can appreciate right now.
If you want a handful of suggestions, here are a few things I like to appreciate around the holidays:
- All the tasty food.
- My health.
- My family and friends.
- That I have a roof and a warm house while the snow falls and the cold wind blows.
- The beautiful winter landscapes.
3. Give someone else a little joy.
“Since you get more joy from giving joy to others, think carefully about the happiness you can give.”
Eleanor Roosevelt
This may sound like an empty cliché, but it certainly works. One of the best ways to become happier is simply to make others happier.
When you make someone else happy, you feel, see, feel and hear it. And that happy feeling flows back to you.
And since the Law of Reciprocity is strong, there is another benefit. People will feel like giving something back to you.
Or like paying someone else.
And so the two of you (or more) continue to build an upward spiral of positivity, helping, cheering up and a listening ear and support.
4. Focus on what is most valuable.
“You can never get enough of what you don’t need to make you happy.”
Erik Hoffer
“Joy is not in things; it is within us.”
Benjamin Franklin
Instead of focusing on many things, focus on what is most important and valuable to you.
If you still have Christmas gifts to buy, instead of giving away a lot of expensive items, it might be better to give one thing that the person you’re giving it to will really appreciate.
Or maybe you can forgo giving something physical altogether. And instead, give away an experience that will become a special day and cherished memory for him or her or for the two of you.
However you choose to do things during the holidays, make it YOUR choices as best you can and don’t a lot of things that mainly leave you feeling deflated.
5. Just accept how you feel right now.
“We can’t change anything until we accept it. Condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses.”
Carl Jung
Maybe try some of the tips above.
And they still can’t help you shake off the negativity, worry, or stress you’re carrying. I would then suggest that you just accept that the feeling is there.
Tell yourself: this is how I feel right now and I accept it.
This may sound counterintuitive and like giving up.
However, by accepting how you feel instead of resisting it, you reduce the emotional energy you are feeding into this conflict or problem.
And then it tends to lose speed, like a car that runs out of fuel.
Sometimes the problem or conflict becomes so weak that it simply disappears from your mind.
By accepting what is, you have now freed up energy and your attention, so that your mind can become more sober, open and constructive again.
And you can see more clearly and take targeted action towards a solution.