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Why Rashida Jones and Ezra Koenig call themselves husband and wife

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Why Rashida Jones and Ezra Koenig call themselves husband and wife
Matt Winkelmeyer/VF24/WireImage for Vanity Fair

Rashida Jones explains why she and her boyfriend Ezra Koenig consider themselves husband and wife even though they are not legally married.

“We’re not married,” Jones, 48, said The New Yorker in an interview published on Sunday, July 7. “That’s just what we call each other. But we are what we are, in the eyes of God!”

She continued, “My parents didn’t get married until my dad had his first brain aneurysm and my sister was six months old, because of legal issues. I’m sure we’ll get married someday, but in principle that’s how it is.” (The Parks and recreation alum is the daughter of producer Quincy Jones and late model Peggy Lipton.)

In 2011 – years before Rashida and Koenig, 40, started dating – the I love you husband star touched on the topic of marriage and explained why she may never walk down the aisle.

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‘Marriage doesn’t actually buy you anything. I mean, Chris Messinawho is my costar in [Monogamy] is with my very good friend [producer Jennifer Todd],” she said E! News at the time. “They are not married, but they have two children and they are very happy. You don’t buy anything for it. You just buy a whole big parade of a wedding to make other people happy.

Rashida and Koenig have been together since 2016. The actress and the Vampire Weekend frontman welcomed their first child, son Isiah, in 2018. We weekly only confirmed at the time.

Rashida Jones makes it clear that she and Ezra Koenig are not married, but consider themselves husband and wife 585
Stefanie Keenan/WireImage

While you’re talking to NPR in 2021, Rashida opened up about the “emotionally intense couple years that followed” the birth of their child, when her mother died of cancer in May 2019, eight months after they became parents. She was 72.

“It was kind of like back-to-back-to-back-to-back, just heartbreaking and pulling my heart in all different directions. … I was in shock,” she explained. “I don’t even know if that’s a word, but I was just not in my body at all and I just had a baby. I was double out of my body.”

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She continued, “The craziest thing about birth and death is just the utter rawness of feelings. I still have that feeling, I think. It’s like something is tearing inside you. It’s very binary, both things – becoming a mother and losing my mother – like, there’s my life before and my life after. And strangely enough, there is something that wasn’t recognizable before these two things happened.”

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